Since Arizona's new Immigration Law has been in the news lately, ad nauseum, I thought I'd drag out another classic post. Also, I'm just too lazy to write anything new right now. I hope you enjoy it:
Seems like every day you read about another superhero job being filled by an illegal alien. I mean, first it was that guy from Krypton, going around acting like he was better than us. Next thing you know, he's bringing cousins and pets and a whole bottled city here, all taking our jobs and soaking up our yellow sunshine like there's no tomorrow.
Then, due to poor screening and security practices, the police department just hands out detective jobs to any old Martian who walks in off the street.
But that's just the tip of the iceberg. Next, a couple of winged weirdos from some place called Thanagar (try and find THAT on a map of the galaxy) come along and *poof!* they're in the Justice League of AMERICA. And I hear they got sweet jobs as museum curators or something. What? They too good to pick fruit or park cars?
And some Earthmen are even working for alien masters right under our noses. Did anybody ASK the Green Lantern Corps to send a guy to watch over Earth? I know I didn't. Who watches the watchmen? That's what I'd like to know!
And that Adam Strange guy! He should be here, using his skills to defend us, not some alien planet!
Even the Super-Friends internship went to a couple of aliens. Apparently, Wendy and Marvin (two decent, Earth teens) weren't good enough. The Super-Friends went and got a couple of aliens with "super powers" to take their slots. And they brought in a "space monkey". Did they even have to put that thing in quarantine??
No, it's gettin' so that a guy spends his whole life training and uses his millions of inherited dollars to become a crime fighter, only so he can see his job go to a bunch of "J'onny -come-lately's" from distant worlds. I, for one, find it sad.
Undocumented Superworkers is the preferred nomenclature, dude. And I still think Jayna is hot (Jayna's the chick wonder twin, right?)
ReplyDeleteIf this was supposed to be written tongue in cheek, my friend, I'm not laughing. How about giving Marvel's alien heroes some equal time?
ReplyDeleteBTW, yes, Jayna's still a hottie. Always has.
No, this was a serious expose on the actual problem we are having with alien superheroes- OF COURSE IT WAS TOUNG -IN-CHEEK. To be honest, I couldn't think of any Marvel alien heroes of the Silver Age.. except maybe the Silver Sufferer. Too gloomy.
ReplyDeletethat's Tongue, not toung!
ReplyDeleteJ'onny come lately? Silver Sufferer? HAR! Marvel characters? How about the Impossible Man way outstaying his visa at the Baxter Building in the 70's? And you just know that Starfire'll get a pass any day to any social benefit she wants, right?
ReplyDeleteNeill
Neill: HA! I'd forgotten the Impossible Man. And of course, we can never let our guard down when faced with the Skrull menace!
ReplyDeleteWhat about Thor? Sure, he looks like a real American, but he's from another dimension.
ReplyDeleteThere's ABSOLUTELY no border fence between the U.S. and Asgard!
Yes, we've been keeping an eye on this so-called "Dr. Donald Blake". Frankly, we find his frequent vacations to Norway rather suspicious.
ReplyDeleteAnd don't get me started on that JLA member who claims to be a foreign dignitary from "Atlantis". Oh, sure, he may look all-American, but we're still not sure about his father's nationality. We suspect this whole "Sea-King" act is just a red herring.
While we're at it with the JLA (or JSA)--how about this case of the identity theft of Diana Prince involving a woman from an island located god knows where, and working in the military, yet!
ReplyDeleteNeill